10 Inch Explorer

My eyes are bigger than my pussy.



This is the 10″ Explorer.  I was so excited about it- but I just didn’t think it was really as big as it looked.  I don’t SEE 10 inches often enough to know HOW big it is.

So the specs:

The Colt Products are made by Cal Exotic’s.  I looked it up both on XR’s site and on the Cal Exotic site and it doesn’t say that it’s phthalate free.  It is described as ” Hygienically superior. Easy handling, solid, and non-porous.”  Non-porous means that it can be sterilized, so that makes me feel good.  The ridge that you see is smooth.  2 inches in diameter at it’s widest point.  2 inches…

It’s wonderfully massive and I pretty much mounted it the minute I got it out of the package.  It’s been a long day, and I knew it was waiting for me when I got home.

Ok… first, I washed it.  It’s a rubber material or something… it smells kind of like a tire- but I didn’t smell that the second I took it out of the package.  You get your nose close to it, and yeah, there it is- but it wasn’t an “overwhelming, out of the package, what the fuck IS that?” smell right out.  So I washed it- and lubed it.

And then, yeah.

I totally fucked it.

The pliable and bendable material makes you feel filled but not quite as invaded as harder materials.  Don’t get me wrong, I do LOVE the Goliath by Tantus, which is about the same it width but that isn’t very flexible.  This one is, and I like that.

It’s part of the Stimulus Sale going on at ExtremeRestraints.com right now.  The sale is going on NOW.  So check it out.  There’s a lot of different items, from the more vanilla vibes to a Leather Straight Jacket (which is expensive but still marked almost in HALF).

Head on over.

Happy Endings are cool- massage oil review

I don’t give or get a lot of massages. Natt gave me a foot massage in NYC, but that may have been the last one I’ve gotten. There’s two reasons for this. 1) I am insanely ticklish and 2) I don’t get a lot of offers.

That being said, I don’t mind giving them. I like touching people. I have realized that I don’t get touched very often. My husband and I don’t get close very often. I don’t have friends that I hug a lot. I’m not a cuddler. So when I have the opportunity to put my hands on someone in a way that isn’t even sexual, but just human contact- I enjoy it.

My husband has pretty bad peripheral vascular disease so he really benefits from a massage, but sometimes it’s painful so it’s not often that I can do it. The other night, he asked me if I wouldn’t mind maybe rubbing his legs and hands. I figured this was as good a time as any to tryout my new massage oil.

It’s a mild scented oil.  It’s pretty thin too.  I put some on my hands and slowly worked it into his skin.  It was not an overwhelming scent, which was good.  I just can’t deal with overwhelming scents.  I massaged his legs for a long time, it didn’t dry too quickly, which is saying a lot considering my husband has pretty dry skin.

I rubbed his legs only having to add oil once.  It made his skin really soft and once the oil was dried, it left his skin smooth enough to keep rubbing with out adding oil.  I think we both enjoyed it.  The touching, the sensation.

And while I am skeptical about the pheremones, the leg massage DID end with a happy ending, for ME!  yeah!!!

I like it curved…

I know they are not popular, but I admit that I really LIKE jelly toys and I have a good collection of vibrators from Don Johnson. I like the way they move and bend.  The fact that the Paradise Curve is phthalate free jelly like material and silicone makes it even better. It still has that ‘nail salon’ smell to it- so if you are scent sensitive I would stay away from the jelly type toys, phthalate-free or not. They all just smell that way. I have heard that it’s the phthalates that make is smell that way- but I have jelly toys with or without them and you can’t tell a difference by the smell.

Noses aside, I did enjoy this toy. I prefer the curved toys to the sharp angles that some g-spot toys offer. The nubs on the curve are not really necessary as the vibration does enough. I love the bullet in the END of Doc Johnsons toys, as opposed to some manufacturers who put them in the base. What’s the point of THAT?  The bullet vibe on the end was great against my gspot and coupled with a bullet vibe, it’s narrow enough for smooth thrusting, but still thick enough to be satisfying.


The controller is a simple up and down controller with 4 speeds, but I would like to see an end to the wired controllers. Over all, this is a good toy. The vibration was good for clitoral (that is where the nubs are nice) or gspot penetration for those who enjoy jelly-type toys.

It comes in aqua and pink.  Mine’s pink.  Check out this and the whole collection of great toys from VibeReview.


The Mia- better than a coffee break!!

One of the things I love in life is lipstick. Not because I wear a lot of makeup, because I don’t. But I do own a lot of lipstick. Lipstick changes things for me. It lights up my whole face when I wear it. Lipstick has saved me many days when I didn’t want people to know that something was wrong. My mother always told me, “Just put your lipstick on and nobody will know you’re sad.”

You’d be surprised how well that works.

So when I saw The Mia- I made me smile. A big pink lipstick case holds so much promise for good days. This one, of course, vibrates. It also combines another thing I love, my computer. It charges via USB drive.

Yes, you heard me. Geek girls, hold on to your panties. This vibrator has a removable cap exposing a USB connection and you can plug it right into your USP port. It LOOKS like a jump drive. It makes my nipples hard just thinking about it.  It’s a hard plastic, which I don’t use much of anymore, but it’s phthalate free and non porous.  Did you know that Eden Fantasies has a page on materials and it give details and such on all of them.  Very cool.

Just because I COULD, I boldly plugged it in to the USB port on my monitor at work. Nobody questioned it, and I sat, getting wet, knowing that I was looking at the next thing that was going to give me an orgasm.

I closed my office door towards the end of the day, hiked up my skirt and pulled my panties to the side. I turned it on high (10 pushes of the + button to get to the highest setting), then there were 3 more settings of different speeds of pulsing. I played with the fast pulse speed to get me warmed up and then went back to the continuous vibration. Always my favorite.

I THINK that this might be a little stronger than the Lily. Perhaps because it’s stronger and more compacted. I stroked and rubbed it over my clit, up and down my pussy, feeling the smooth, strong vibrations. It’s not harsh. It’s not overpowering, but it is strong enough to have me writhing and aching. I put one leg on my desk and pushed two fingers into my wet pussy- going over my usual jerk off fantasy of Sean, fucking myself and working the vibe on my sweet spot, aching and burning until my body shook and I whispered his name again and again until a warm electric orgasm came over me. Mmmmm. I wiped it off and slipped it into my pocket and slipped my shoes back on.

Standing, I opened my office door, smiled at the chaos and walked past it on the way to the ladies room.

Thanks to Eden Fantasys. The Mia is exactly the kind of break I need in my day!

Where I get lost… and found

I always think of Sean when I masturbate.  It used to be Z, but somewhere that changed.  Maybe because it was for months and months I would leave him voicemails so he could hear me cumming, and the idea of that got me so hot that it’s just sort of fixated into my brain.  Saying his name is so fucking sexy it pours from my lips like water.

Lately there has been too much thought and not enough fucking.  I get lost in my head and I think too much.  I get off center.  I lose my way.  Lost, I lean in to whatever is standing.  I search where answers cannot be found and I find myself someplace that I never intended to be.

Today, after a few days of uncertainly and indecision, I finally laid on my bed and didn’t think.  Somewhat sleepy, I turned off my brain and let go.  Let go of thoughts of Giacomo and the weird confusion I am facing lately.  Turned off the moments between me and The Ex and how things between us are making me rethink everything I thought I wanted.  Quieted my mind from thoughts of deadlines, and travel and parenthood.  I stopped to reconnect with my body.

My new vibe, as perfect as I knew it would be, humming gently in my hands.  The smooth silicon gently sliding over my tongue, and then touching the end of it between my legs.  Allowing the vibrations to slowly easy my lips open and slide between my flesh.  It had been a long time.  Weeks.  I thought momentarily about Giacomo.  His tongue gliding expertly between my legs- teasing and tasting me… slowly, quicky.  Again and then again.

But my mind wandered again to Sean.  It always does.  His voice in my ear, trickling down my spine.

“I’ve been thinking about fucking that sweet pussy baby.  Be a good girl for daddy.”

I spread my legs for him.  Aching, burning, sliding.  Searching for that sweet spot, and then teasing it.  Touching down hard and then moving it away.  Edging closer each time.  The strong motor delivering a smooth vibration pulsing deep through my clit.  I was tempted to push it inside me.  Fill me with the humming cock, the curved ridges, the deliberate g-spot angle.  But I didn’t.  I wanted the tease… the burn.

“You better fucking cum for me, you little bitch.”

Yes, yes I will.  I kept my legs open, my knees spread.  The vibe pressed, painfully on my clit even though I wanted to move it away.  The burn was too much- too hard- too sensitive.

Now, slut.  Cum fucking now for me.  Do it baby. I love how filthy you are for me.  Show me how bad you want it.

It burned and melted through me.  I thust and grind into it.  Fucking it hard.  My head throwing and my back arching.  The molten fuck, spreading over my skin.  Decadent.  So sweet I could taste it on my lips.  It was familiar and welcome.  While I texted Sean to thank him, as I always do, my mind moved back to center and my body, my skin began to breathe again.

Missed connections- BBG and the G-Rock

Sounds like a bad rap song.

I don’t like reviewing toys that don’t hit their mark. I verified with my gal at Vibe Review that she still wanted me to do a review even if I didn’t like the toy and she said yes.

That is the wrong way to start, it’s not that I don’t LIKE the G-rock. Really, I love it. Let me be clear in telling you that there is nothing wrong with this toy. The make of it is great, it’s comfortable and the vibrations are fantastic. I had high hopes for this toy. Really. The problem with it is me.

It’s not you, it’s me.

The G-rock is a wonderfully designed toy with all the right features in mind. It’s made of a really good phthlate free silicon. It doesn’t have any weird feel or scent like many toys do. The vibrations are nice on my g-spot. but this woman does not cum by g-spot alone. It missed my clit by about an inch. I tried reinserting it a few times. Perhaps my gspot is lower than others, perhaps my pussy is just small and compact. I have a tilted cervix, maybe it just just pushed it out of place. I don’t know. I was really disappointed because the vibrations are nice. Not too strong up front, which might have been a bummer, but I wouldn’t know. The hands free idea is nice. I was looking forward to it, but all it did, was make me soaked. Vibrations on my gspot do that. When I tried to sort of bend the front part down to reach my clit, the bottom part pulls out. It just doesn’t fit me. Damn.

Regardless, this does seem like a really well made toy. It has all the right ideas. Good design and feel. It has the best intentions. sigh… Maybe next time I will try the Snugglepuss or just stick with the Rabbit.

Hearts Delight- my first glass dildo

My first experience with glass. I’ve been admiring them in the sex stores for quite some time now, but have been scared off by the high price tag. Of course, the ones I have been drooling over are upwards towards $100 that are gorgeous enough to display on a mantle, if I had one, and if didn’t have children.

My dildo experience was with a cock-like sleeve that fit over the hard plastic vibe. That sufficed me for many years until I bought my first rabbit. I was perfectly happy with that also, who wouldn’t be?? However, I still found myself peeking in the display cabinet at ConRev at the hand blown (no pun intended) glass dildo’s with the two color swirl inside and wondering what it would feel like, just once.

When Adam and Eve asked me to review the Hearts Delight, I was like a kid at Christmas. It’s so pretty! It has a smooth shaft and a round bulbous head. It’s slightly curved. It also has a heart shaped handle, which is perfect for use with a partner. Just wrap your fingers through the top of the heart (like a fist) and you can use an in and out motion that is comfortable to maintain.

It package comes with a small sample of lube, but since the Ex was already licking my pussy we didn’t need it. It was cold, but smooth. The head pushed in, opening me up and then sliding in, frictionless. Ahh lovely. I won’t say it feels like the real thing, obviously it doesn’t- but it was good. Soo good. The weight of the glass, and the round head gives you this amazing feeling of being filled, without the violated feeling of rubber or silicon dildo’s that sometimes catch on a dry spot. He pushed it inside me, about 4 inches in, so the head rubbed against my gpot. Smooooth. Back and forth. I quickly realized that the cold was gone and the dildo had taken on my body temperature. Pushing down on the handle pushed the head a little harder on my g-spot, while he fucked me and licked at my clit. The handle is not too big and did not get in the way.

I came the first time- filled, open and wanting more. Then he sat back, held on to the handle and really fucked me with it. He pushed and pulled, twisted it, moving the head to touch every part of my insides. Slow and fast. Slower and oh god faster. Different angles and different depths. I came the second time, pulling the pillow over my face and moaning into it, almost screaming, trying not to wake the kids down the hall. I couldn’t stop fucking it, and I was soon moving back and forth, countering his thrusts towards me, amazed by the smooth surface and the way that the weight made it feel that what was inside me was so big and I was so filled. I came a third time, and then a forth on my own, cause I wanted to see if it was easy to use alone- yeah, it was. My fingers laced right through the heart and I could tell I could have kept it up for as long as I needed to.

No lube was needed, but I wonder what it would be like if I did use it? You can heat it, or cool it for extra sensation- but I suspect it eventually blends to your own body temperature. The insertable part is about 5 inches. The shaft is 3 1/2 inches around and the wides part of the head is 4 1/2 inches around. So while it’s not the biggest dildo, I really think that the weight of it and the temperature made it feel comparable to something much bigger, without the “ahh ahh ouch!” factor.

I love this dildo. Love it. Love everything about it. I can’t wait to use it again, and again and oooooh, ahhhh again!!


I love nipple clamps

Have I mentioned that really love nipple play?  Well I do.  From the first time I had clamps on me, I fell captive to that amazing intense pain that comes with being connected that way.


I have recently gotten a pair of clamps, just like the ones in this picture.  Clover clamps.  I never actually handled the ones that were on me in this picture- and I’ve had them on me twice.  The ones I have are the same kind.  A heavy chain and rubber grips.  Unlike other nipple clamps, these don’t have a screw to loosen them for your comfort.  The ones I have, when you open them, they catch, the moving parts.  It doesn’t make it impossible to use- it’s just notable.  The key to having fun with nipple clamps is in the movement.  When clamps are on your nipples, and unmoved, it stops hurting so much.  It goes numb.  What’s the fun in that?

Be prepared for the REMOVAL of the clamps, by the way.  Yeah, when the blood goes rushing back to that area- that’s a pain that is part delicious, part HOLY FUCK.  So be prepared for that.

A word of caution.  You probably should not wear nipple clamps for too long.  Maybe 15-20 minutes?  Any area that is deprived circulation is at risk for nerve damage and maybe even tissue death.  Keep that in mind.  I’m not a doctor or a Sex Toy Expert (well at least not certified) but it’s common sense right?

Play safe.

Not just any night

He looked at the box again.  Fucking Flame Harness Kit.  He sighed outloud, throwing it back into the bag, looking towards the vanity and his wife brushing her soft brown hair.  It had been two years since they had sex, even though he would occasionally treat her to the oral sex that she so enjoyed.  He craved to be close to her again, but his inability to maintain an erection left him feeling bitter and distant from her.

Watching his beloved porn even become depressing, but he sometimes still found his way to the Internet sites to watch, even though the stirring in his groin never did much more than that.  Pills only caused his blood pressure to rise, and while he was not ready to give up on the idea that he’d ever get an erection again- he certainly was not feeling very positive about it most of the time.

When he saw the two brunettes fucking, one of them with a strap on- the idea came to him.  Perhaps if he had something like this, he could still penetrate her, lay on top of her, move with her.

Be close to her.

It looked harmless enough.  It was not much bigger than his own cock, except for the head was a bit wider than his.  It had a curve to it.  It wasn’t going to make him feel like she’d never want him again.  It wouldn’t make him feel like less of a man.

However… he was staring at it now, and not so sure.  The purple harness that was probably meant to for a girl to wear, except he thought it would protect him from getting squashed.  He was feeling pretty sorry for himself right about now, but he already told her he had a surprise for her.

He thought to grab a big black dildo, or some soy candles.  Maybe even a wooden spoon from the kitchen, but he was watching her- brushing her hair.  She was so beautiful.  He came up behind her in the mirror, his hands laced around her waist and he buried his head into her hair.  She smelled of lemon and lavender.  She sighed, exposing her neck to him- wondering what the evening might bring.

He nuzzled into her flesh, reaching under her thin top and grabbing her breasts, rolling her nipples between his fingers.  She leaned into him, her body warming, molding.  Her pussy aching and and wishing that which she had long learned to stop asking for.  “Lets go to bed,” he whispered into her ear, “I’m going to go to the bathroom.”

She pretended to be asleep, because that’s what she did.  Don’t look disappointed.  No expectations.  No disappointments.  She felt him climb into bed next to her and touched her cheek.  She sighed and opened her eyes as if had interupted her attempts to drift off.  He ran his hands over her body.  Over her curvy flesh and between her legs.  She moaned and sighed with him.  Allowing him to caress and adore her body.  Pangs of guilt washing over her, but she went with it anyway, because it felt good- and she needed his attention.

He held his body away from her, moving between her legs and tasting her.  Licking her slowly, so not to make her orgasm but to warm her up and make her want him.  He needed the right moment, he didn’t want to shock her- or repulse her.  He wanted to make love to his wife.  For the first time in years.

The folds of her pussy swollen and ripe, he moved up over her body.  He was positioned between her legs and she looked up at him.  She pulled him down to kiss him, thinking to simply hold him in her arms as he probably changed his mind part way through.  Depressed hits at strange time, and she had learned not to question it.

She felt him reaching between her legs again- and then felt him.  Him?  No, not him, but something.  Definitely something.  He kissed her, not allowing her to speak as as it slid inside her.  Hard, thick.  She kissed him hard.  Feeling it slide inside her, curving with her body and a think head pressing inside her.  He laid on her, his body on top of hers, as she wrapped her legs around him.  Taking him in.  She closed her eyes and allowed him to slowly thrust inside her.  It had been so long.  So long since she felt him so close, so long since she felt his hips against hers, moving and pressing against her pelvis.  His eyes were closed and he staying laying on her body, his head over her shoulder, not looking at her.  He was conflicted in his emotions.  Feeling somewhat emasculated, but still loving the feeling of her body beneath him.  Her moans and the quiver in her breath.  His body easily thrust and he tried to use the harness as an extension of his own body.  Without any feeling, he continued to use her body for hints, feel her move towards or away from him to know if it was working for her.  He thrust inside her, feeling her legs wrapped around him, but not too eager, probably to spare his feelings.

Her body started to tremble beneath his, and he felt his cock, buried beneath the soft padding, stirring with futility.  He wanted to cry, partially because he felt he had disappointed her by being unable to love her in the way he wanted to always be able to.  He also wanted to cry, because being this close to her made him feel more alive than he had in a long long time.

He felt her moaning and recognized the tremble in her hips.  He continued, thrusting into her slowly- carefully.  Not looking at her but loving her as best as he could in this moment.  Holding her body beneath his and letting her hold on to him so tightly, the way she used to…

She cried out, her orgasm shaking and breathless.  She was gasping…

and sobbing.

He finally looked at her.  Her eyes were filled with tears- they streamed down her face.  He wiped her tears away.

“God, I love you so much baby,” he whispered to her.

for the love of purple fuck toys…

I like Doc Johnson Toys. Ok, they are not phthalate free. I will say that right now. They are not and I have just been told that I really SHOULD use condoms with toys that are not phthalate free. I found this disclaimer on the Vibe Review Site so I think I should include it here.

Jelly rubber is cited as the main type of toy material which contains phthalates. As this point, nobody knows for sure that phthalates are dangerous, and in fact, the FDA has authorized phthalates to be used in food, household items, and a variety of other common products. In any case, to be on the safe side VibeReview is phasing out these types of toys. In the meantime, if you are concerned about phthalates, you should use only phthalate-free toys.

That aside, I will tell you that have not experienced any side effects from it, while I know there are some people who do.

Ok so looky here…

Yeah- it’s so pretty.

So I love that it’s waterproof and this afternoon I climbed in the shower with it. I am recovered from this weeks bang fest now just horny as hell again. This is a thick dildo. 4 1/2 inches around, at the wide points, but you can see how it sort of waves in and out. You can feel the contours, and thrusting, they feel never ending- back and forth and back and forth… and oh, wait, where was I. sigh…

The vibration in the head of the shaft makes it perfect for clitoral stimulation (good vibes!) or a little extra against your g-spot. I don’t know about you but it doesn’t HAVE to curve to hit vibrate against my gspot. It felt great sliding in and out of me. The contours reminded me of the Smart Balls, which gave me an idea, based on what I did YESTERDAY.

Climbing out of the shower, I put the BB Magic Wand inside my pussy, turned on at full blast. Standing, I closed my legs, holding it in place. I felt so full; really it’s a nice big thick shaft. Then I got my Hitachi Magic Wand….

(Now don’t start with me about being hooked on it. Of COURSE I am. So what? It has not desensitized my clit, if nothing else it’s made it more sensitive. I CAN cum from other vibes- from tongues and fingers. So WHAT if I like the vibrator that fucks up the reception on the TV!!)

… and I pressed it against my pussy. Low speed, over the towel. I usually cannot have direct contact and often times it’s over my outer labia as well (I don’t really HAVE much inner labia) Yea, very pretty pussy. It felt good. The Magic Wand was vibrating inside me and my pussy was naturally pulsing around the stationary intrusion. I increased the intensity to High Speed, and then moved the towel.

The Hitachi was pressed against me, outside my pussy lips so it was vibrating my whole pussy and then I was filled and my gspot was being hummed in delicious rhythm. I was still standing, bracing myself against the wall in the vanity area.

I thought about Sean, which I almost always do. He is still my dirty jerk off fantasy when I want it fast and hard. He was forcing me to cum; not letting me thrust, or rub. I was just stuffed and vibed and taking it hard. My orgasm came in a slow moving wave. I felt it hitting me slowly and I didn’t fight it or try to rush it. It was delicious and as it peaked, I felt my body release and then it happened… I gushed all over the place; over the Hitachi, on my hands, down my legs and onto the bathroom floor.  I don’t usually do that, by the way- maybe twice before and never on my own like this. I let it run down my legs, feeling that delicious release until I practically collapsed against my vanity.

I was a mess. There was a small pool of ejaculate on the floor at my feet (It would have grossed me out if I hadn’t had just cum so fucking hard). I removed the toy, covered in my cum and tossed it into the sink for cleaning and cleaned off the Hitachi, (after I wiped up my mess from the bathroom tile).


Not all vibes do the same thing for me. Some are used on their own; some can be used in addition to another. I think when you have a large selection you can mix and match and who knows what kind of combination you come up with! Kind of like Cold Stone Creamery. Yes, I just compared my jerking off to ice cream.