How times have changed

Whilst in the process of writing a review this week, I was thinking about times past in regards to the present. That got me thinking about how much everything has changed from when I was a child; to how everything is now for the children of this generation.

Today I’ve been trying to read an Erotic Anthology, and because it’s a Saturday; I have my own child, I also have my niece staying over, they’re both playing outside on their bikes and running in and out of the house every few minutes like children do. Since I am reading a story in-between their next fleeting visit back indoors (I now have another new reason to love short stories), so I can have the book closed before they get in the living room and read the title.  Laughing at myself that as an adult I have to hide my ‘Book porn’ from them so they don’t inquisitively ask me, or even knowing my luck the teacher in school what ‘Bondage Erotica’ is. I associated it, in my head with trying to sneak a peek at my parents porn magazine that I found under their mattress when I was 10.

Now thinking about that, it seems really weird. Seriously? A porn magazine under the mattress? My child is shit out of luck when he gets to his teenage years, if he’s hoping to find a porn magazine under my mattress he’s going to be hugely disappointed, and more than likely completely repulsed  to find my under the bed restraint system instead.

This then got me thinking about how times have changed. I mean would he even contemplate looking under my mattress for a porn magazine in this century? Or are those the actions of a child from long ago?

I remember when I was younger, my friends and I stealing our parents clothes magazines so that we could look at the underwear models. My brother was notorious for it, it would be somewhat of a race for who could liberate it first. In all fairness it was usually him, I’d find them later in our ‘den’ in a plastic bag, buried in the loose mud next to the tree. This is where we would hide everything that we didn’t want our parents to find. It wasn’t all clothes magazines, it’d be the odd chocolate bar that we wouldn’t be allowed to eat; a toy our parents had insisted we’d throw out, and even the odd page 3 from the Sun Newspaper.

A couple of months ago I was having a conversation with my mother, she was outraged that her adopted son of 11 years old was just caught, by her, looking at porn on his tablet. She couldn’t believe it, she told me this wasn’t normal behaviour for an 11 year old. I laughed at her outrage and told her that boys will be boys. She couldn’t believe it, her son (my brother) had NEVER been like this when he was younger she declared. It was then that I had to remind her, that when we were younger we didn’t have access to the internet, we couldn’t just get a hold of porn so easily; I filled her in on the stealing of her magazines, and told her that if it were a different time, then she would have probably caught him looking at porn, and not just him more than likely all three of us.

You see, I was a child of the 80’s, computers and the internet hadn’t fully made their way in to the homes of practically everyone then. So the only way we could cease our curiosity was to take things that we found, hide them and then have a good look at them later on; usually with a group of our friends – we would laugh at the half naked men and women, whilst wondering if that is what our bodies were going to look like in a few years. I couldn’t just Google an embarrassing problem I was having – I’d have to either confide in someone or just deal with it the best way I knew how – To guess!

Part of me is envious as how easy my child now has it (Not the potential of looking at porn easily online! – Although I’m sure when he gets to that he’ll be thrilled) but all the information that is readily available to him; yet the other part of me is so relieved that I didn’t have to go through high school with camera phones, and the ability to record someone/something at a whim, that social media wasn’t around to document every embarrassing moment.

It’s now 2015, when I think back on being a child it seems like it wasn’t that long ago at all; but when I think of the fact that my child isn’t probably going to do any of the stuff that I used to do when I was younger to get my thrills; made me think about how much time really has gone by; and how much everything has actually changed.

I mean, does anyone even have a porn magazine hid under their mattress anymore? Does anyone even buy these magazines now full stop?

I’d love to know what you think in the comments, was your childhood much different from mine?

Review of Chic and Discrete Sexy Secrets Compact & Bullet

This is the Chic and Discrete Sexy Secrets Compact from Screaming O, it is a compact with a mirror but behind a secret compartment is a small but perfectly formed bullet vibrator and storage for 3 spare batteries.

This was sent to me for review by the lovely people at screaming O, please visit their websites to check out their full range  screamingo.com &/or myscreamingostudio.com

As you can see from the above picture it comes in the same discrete packaging as the rest of this range, looking like something that you could pick up in any shop on the high street.

When you slip it out of the packaging it is an equally discrete looking product, the compact really does look like something that you might find in any girls handbag on a Saturday night out around town.

and when you open it up you are faced with what looks like a mirror in a little compact, and a plain plastic base, the mirror isn’t great its curved slightly to fit into the lid of the compact, but as its main function is to make this compact look like a compact and not like storage for a sex toy this isn’t really an issue.

You lift up the plastic to reveal the compacts secret compartment, and the bullet vibrator which is hidden inside it.

The bullet has a lovely soft touch covering on it and it feels nice in the hand, it is only small but don’t let its size fool you it has 3 speeds and a 4th pulse setting which are all operated by a single push button on the bottom of the toy.

The bullet takes 3 cell type batteries which not only are included but they also included 3 spare batteries for when they run out. The bullet is also waterproof which means that it is perfect for play in the bathroom and easy to clean to.

I say this alot, but I am going to say it again just in case you haven’t read any of my other reviews for this kind of toy.

Inside the battery compartment there is a piece of card, on the card is a little picture to show you which way round you should insert the batteries, do not remove this card, it is not just packaging, it stops the toy from shorting out, and removing it might stop the toy from working.

The bullet is nice and quiet as are all the vibrators in this range, so perfect for anyone who shares a house or has children, it not only looks nice and discrete but it sounds it to.

Overall: I think that this is a cute little compact, its a great idea, one that has been used a few times by other toy makers and always works well. I love the branding and I like the feel of the soft touch coating on the bullet and its nice and powerful to. Its great that its easy to clean and nice and quiet to.

Interested in getting your own compact? check out the Screaming O sites  screamingo.com &/ormyscreamingostudio.com

Or if you are in the UK check out Lovehoney by clicking here

Review of Doc Johnson Decadence G Spot Vibe

I was lucky enough to be send this to review from sextoys.co.uk, I received my order very quickly and in some lovely discrete packaging, no chance of the postie been able to see what was inside, or your nosey neighbours having any ideas about what you have been ordering.

I opened up the packaging to find this toy in a nicely designed doc johnson plastic box, such a shame that these cannot be recycled, but the design is nice, no smutty pics or anything just simple, pink and clear with clear instructions of how to use the toy.

I opened the packaging and took out the vibrator, the toy has that lovely soft touch coating on it, which means that although it is a solid plastic toy it has the feel of something softer and warmer. It has the Doc Johnson logo printed on it in a contrasting colour and it is very very pink.

To insert the battery you just unscrew the bottom of the vibe, it takes just one AA type battery, possibly the easiest type to get hold of as they sell them everywhere, you pop the battery in and screw the base back on to secure it.

The vibe is operated using a twist mechanism on the base of the toy and this means that the speed is totally controllable, the further you twist the faster the vibrator vibrates. I didn’t find this to be a really powerful toy but given its size I was pleasantly surprised, I would give this a 5 out of 10 for vibration strength.

This vibrator is small enough to fit in your handbag and take away with you if you were going on holiday or for a day out and fancied a bit of fun while you were away.

It is also very very quiet, especially when been used internally, there is no chance of anyone having a clue that you where upto anything with this toy, making it perfect for those who live in a shared house.

The vibe is waterproof and as such it means that it is easy to clean and perfect for anyone who likes to use sex toys in the bath. It also comes with a cool little storage case with and insert to ensure that the vibrator is stored snugly and doesn’t rattle around. The case is slightly see through so although it isn’t shaped like a sex toy it isn’t discrete enough to be able to leave it lying around without anyone knowing what is inside.

Overall, I really like this little vibe, its cute, its powerful enough to do the trick, its quiet, it takes easy to get hold of batteries, it has its own little case and is waterproof. Which means it ticks most of my boxes.

If you want to get hold of your own Doc Johnson Decadence G-Spot Vibe then click here to go to Sextoys.co.uk

Lingerie from TabuToys

This is my first corset.  Not only the first one I’ve owned, but the first one I’ve even WORN!  I got it at the suggestion from Tabutoys.com.  It’s pink and it’s shiny- and I do love it.

The thing I learned about corsets is this: A corset is NOT a one man show.  There’s NO fucking way you can put this on and then WAIT for your partner to come home.  It just can’t be done.  I tried loosening the laces and then pulling the hooks together.  I tried turning it around, hooks connected, and tried to lace it and then turn it.  Yeah, that didn’t work.  I was breaking a SWEAT just trying to get sexy!!

Isn’t this my fucking life??

So finally I called for reinforcements.  No way to be spontaneous there!!  I was reminded of Rose from Titanic and her mother, yanking so hard to tie her up.

I guess I have two options.  I can go to a neighbor or a co-worker to have them tie me up in the corset.

OR

I can just put on a SNUGGIE, and let my partner just see the back of the corset while he’s tying it, then run to the bedroom, and then call him in….  ta-dah!!!

I do love this corset.  I think the pink looks good on me.  If I’m gonna WEAR something lacey and girly, I’m going all out with the sexy bold colors!!!  The G-string was funny.  It was a rectagular peice of lace trimmed fabric, and then the string part.  I think I can make a hair scrunchie out of it.  Ha.

You’ll love their line of lingerie.  They have a little something for every shape and size.

Thanks to Tabutoys for sending me this sexy peice!!  I hope to get more!!

The Cane

“On all 4’s, he ran the thin stick over my body.  It tickled.  He teased me with it, and then THWAP!  I yelped out.  It was sharp, stinging.  Then the tickling again.  I moved away from it- until he started hitting me again, slow and soft, then harder, harder, faster… then pause.  then THWAP.  Harder.  I flinched, lowered my head, ass in the air.  It stung.  Again, a hard sting on my thigh.  FUCK.

“Oh you’re such a sissy,” he taunted at me the cane striking me at the round curve of my ass, “I have barely begun.  I have just…(whack)…begun…(whack)… to give you…(whack)… what you deserve…(WHACK).”

I grunted in between and cried out the last strike.  He traced the cane back up my back tickling less, striking more.  While I tried to take it, I know I cried out and sobbed like a scared virgin.  I knew he was going easy on me.  I didn’t know how much I could take, but I knew he would push me two inches past my limit before stopping to to soothe me, just a little.  And again.  I could hear the thin rattan whip cut through the air with a high pitched whistle.  I knew the cane could break the skin had he hit me much harder.

The marks would fade within a day, I knew I would wish them to last longer.”

Gentle or not, I do love the cane.  I love the way it slices through the air and the sharp sting against my skin.  How it goes from playful tickling to sharp sting.  I am getting a case for mine, since it is very thin and I’m worried it will break.  It’s simple and raw.  Nothing fancy but perfect for D/s play.  For beginners, start out gentle.  I suggest striking your calf to get the feel of how hard you want to strike.  Cane’s cane leave heavy bruises and break the skin if you are not careful.  Play hard, but play safe.

Old School Vibe with upgrades

I have not used a hard slim vibe in many years.  For EVER that was my main dildo staple.  The slim vibes that took 2 C batteries.  I’ve had several in my life.  I thought I was the only person who ever broke vibrators.

It seems like it never happened to any of my friends.

What the fuck was I doing to my vibrators that they would just stop working??

Over the years, I rotated between red and black slim vibes until they stopped making the C battery ones and went to AA batteries.  I admit I was somewhat disappointed, because I figured a bigger battery meant a stronger vibration.  It was at that time that I bought my first Dildo Sleeve and put that over my defunct C battery slim vibe.  From there I finally made the move to dildo’s and the rest is history.

However, when Babeland offered this one, I jumped at the chance!  The Showerbabe is a slim vibe.  It takes two AA batteries, but there’s this battery cradle that they batteries slip into, and then the whole thing slides into the vibe.  Much less RATTLING!

This is the slim vibe with a few upgrades that I like.  First is the battery thing.  Nothing is worst than in the middle of playing, it sounds like little men are inside your vibe with jackhammers!  Second, I love the handle.  There’s like a little hook, or space that you can put your finger through.  Its easy to hold on to, you can put a finger through it and use you hand, not just your fingers for thrusting.  No cramped hands.  Also, this handle makes it less likely that you will drop it in the SHOWER.  Yes, as the name suggests, it’s waterproof!  Lastly, the power switch, is a button.  Click on- two settings, click off.  No more “speed dialing”  It’s on, it’s off- simple.   The vibration?  Ohhh as good as I remember.

It’s a great price point.  20 bucks.  A good starter vibe if you’re a newbie and I also  heard super sexy porn star Bree Olson say that with slim vibes, you can really just thrust harder and faster than with bigger toys.  Hmmmm, I may have to put that to a test.

The Love Seat, Extreme Restraints

Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication. ~DaVinci

Really, the simplest ideas are the best ones. The Love Seat sent to me from Extreme Restraints is the perfect example.

hitachi magic wand

Ok so this is the simplest idea and it’s so very good. It’s basically just what it looks like. It’s a base and holder for your Hitachi so you be on your knees, and hands free. Yes. Hands Free. There’s something interesting and sexy about grinding against a stationary vibe, especially THIS vibe. The Hitachi in your hands, and you are using your hands to guide it where you want it, apply pressure etc. I don’t know about you, but direct contact from the Hitachi to my clit is often too much, so I sort of go at it from the side, and apply a LOT of pressure. Hands free, you use your hips, your instinct, your pussy… to find the sweet spot. It’s a different sensation- it’s better, dirtier… mmmhmmm.

It is really light weight, I mean, it’s foam. You can’t SIT on it, but you know, you could lean on it, you know, for pressure. Also an awesome addition for fucking doggy style. My Hitachi stays in it now. I don’t have the controller dial, and I think it would be nice to have, not because I like increasing speeds, but because it’s kind of pain to reach into the hole to turn it on and off. There’s no fast way to do that in the case that someone walks in on you, also the controller creates a 6 foot extension cord.

What I didn’t like about this, is the cover. It’s stretchy spandex. It’s soft etc, but it’s attached by a few eyelets so you can see the foam inside. Also the ends are stitched so it supposedly won’t fray, but really, could you make a hem, maybe adda zipper??

For all it’s simplicity and even the cheap cover, it fucking rocks. I took this pic from the Manufacturers site…. to give you an idea. mmmmm, yeah.

hitachi-pic-300x230

ThankyouthankyouTHANKYOU Extreme Restraints for making my Hitachi even better!!

My ‘classy’ vibe

I am usually a hard core vibrator kind of girl. The stronger the better.  However, the Liberte felt very much like a luxury toy. The vibration was strong, but it was a “gentle strong”. The shape and the feel of it is classy and pretty. I’m really a toy slut… pretty vibes are great but I really just want the orgasm.

Look at it this way, there’s the vibes that you “jerk off”with, like the Hitachi… and then there’s toys for “masturbation” or “touching yourself”. A kinder gentler vibe. That is what the Liberte is. I used it while I was watching an adult movie. I was taking my time. The strong vibes didn’t push me to a fast release, but definitely gave me strong decadent orgasm that I wasn’t expecting the first time I used it.
Also used with a partner, he agreed that it was very gentle- but still strong. He couldn’t take it all in his ass, it was too big, he said- however, once you get past the widest part, it narrows considerably and I suspect it would have been really great. However, who am I to say what’s too wide for someone else’s butt?

It comes with a battery, so there’s no looking or charging involved. There are four settings, the first being HIGH. This is a good idea, you don’t have to go LOOKING for the high setting. The third setting, the low setting is too low. Almost non-existent low. The fourth is a rhythmic pulse, but it’s also too low to really consider.

There’s a nice curve so it can also be used for g-spot penetration, or prostate massage. It also has a nice long handle, which is convenient also. Its my ‘classy’ vibe and while this is probably not my go to toy, it’s does have a permanent spot close to my bed.

Are you doing your kegels?

Kegel (KAY-gul or KEY-gul) exercises strengthen the pelvic floor muscles, which support the uterus, bladder and bowel. If you do Kegel exercises regularly and keep your pelvic floor muscles toned, you may reduce your risk of incontinence and similar problems as you get older. Kegel exercises can also help you control urinary incontinence.

I’ve been hearing about this since my first pregnancy and it’s one of those topics, as you get into your 30’s and on, that women nod and smile and laugh about. Do we do them?? Well, I know that often forget. Without getting too clinical, strengthening your kegels will help you to not ‘pee when you sneeze’- which is unfortunately something that happens to lots of women, after having kids, or just as we get older.  The exercises are relatively easy to do, tighten, hold release, repeat.

Kegel exercisers, are like ‘resistance’ training.  Gripping down against something.  This exerciser from VibeReview is made with this in mind.  I read the instructions and thought…what the??

The Energie from Natural Contours is pretty, non threatening and effective.  Basically, you lay on your back and insert the end, using your hands only to support the weight of this ‘barbell’.  With each tighten, pull the barbell in, resting between each time.  Repeat until it’s fully inserted.  Repeat.   I imagine after time, you no longer need to use your hands for support.  The metal barbell weighs about a pound, can be washed and sterilized.

Lets not forget that besides the medical benefits of these exercises, there’s the sexual benefits.  In a nutshell, more control, tighter pussy.  Like any muscle, toning it will improve it’s ‘appearance’ at rest as well as in use right??  The article above claims that you will start to notice results in 8-12 weeks- so after 8-12 weeks of kegels, your partner will also reap the rewards of your hard work.

My thought is, once you can hold this sucker in, while standing… you deserve a theme song.

Vivid Dreams- Savanna

Here’s one for the “Go To” drawer. I have to make a correction to something I said about jelly toys. I don’t like ALL jelly toys. The last one I reviewed, going back later, the scent was too strong. Yes, wash it and it fades. Scented lube- and it masks it. However, right out of the drawer- it’s STRONG. Now I’m not sensitive to scents, but I’m not sensitive to a LOT of things. I suspect that MOST people will be bothered by this scent and a lot of the “sex toy snobs” (term used playfully) will not like it.

Now the Vivid Dreams Savanna does have the sail salon scent, I won’t like. But it’s got all the good Doc Johnson goodness.

Can you see the swirl that wraps around it?? It’s a nice thick vibrating dildo with the bullet up near the tip so it’s good for clitoral stimulation AND penetration. The Doc Johnson Vivid Dreams line all have the thumb dial, which I also really like. Roll it up, roll it down. Easy easy… And waterproof!!

Ok- I have very little luck with jerking off in the shower, but for those of you who DO- this is a good one.

So ok, here’s some phthalate talk. I KNOW that there’s a LOT of talk about using phthalate free products and how that is the safer way to go. Clearly any kind of chemicals are less than perfectly safe. In March of 2008 California banned baby and infant toys with phthalates. Most likely because they are in the mouths of the babies for long perions of time. I also found this article that addressed phthalates in sex toys.

  • moderate use of dildoes (less than 15 min/week) is not associated with any significant health risk
  • heavy usage (1 hour/day) is not associated with any significant health risk, except for pregnant and breastfeeding women who should abstain from heavy usage

Well I do use it more than 15 minutes a week, but maybe not EVERY week. And I am not pregnant or breastfeeding. I am not worried about getting cancer from my dildo’s. I live with a smoker, just outside of LA. Really, something else will get me before the phthalates do. However, I can’t say that I’m unconcerned.

One thing I have noticed is that the jelly toys sell. Looking at what sells on my affiliate accounts, or the toys that my non sex-blogger friends sell, and from people in the business that I’ve asked. Jelly Toys are what people are buying, probably because they cost a little less. For most people (not all), sex toys are a luxury item, not to be used on an every day basis and I suspect that less people are going to want to shell out an EXTRA $40 for a phthalate free toy that is going to be used maybe twice a week for 20 minutes a time.

In the interest of social responsibility, I feel like I need to mention these things now and again. SexToy.com does have a large selection of toys, even jelly like ones that are phthalate free. So if you have concerns, take an extra minute and look for it.