Yes, this is a guide about the LeBron James of sex toys; dildos. Women have been using these bad boys for thousands of years and for good reason. They’re one of the most miraculous products ever made for women. And, if you are one of those ladies that has never had the good fortunate to get her hands on one of these, then this article is just the thing for you. We’ll talk a little about dildos, what they are, the types and then go through some popular options you should start off with. Let’s get right to it.
What Are Dildos?
Yeah, we said that we’re going to talk about what they are, but let’s be honest. Do dildos really need an introduction? If you’re intent on the oxford dictionary definition, then they’re long, penis-like sex toys meant to enter the vagina.
Types of Dildos
Dildos have quite a few different categories, the most out of any other sex toy. We’ll go through each type briefly.
Large Dildos
The only reason behind the making of the large dildos is size. The manufacturers have absolutely zero concern about what the toy looks like or how it feels. The only thing they’re meant to do is serve those women that just can’t seem to get enough inside of them. These toys start off from the size of 6 inches and go all the way up to a foot – Yes, a FOOT! You’re reading a beginners guide to dildos, so we don’t expect you to need these dildos for quite some time. Please don’t be a daredevil and rush straight to 12 inch dildos, you won’t be able to handle these bad boys. If you like em big check out these big black dildos.
Realistic
These dildos are more on the realistic side of things. They’re averagely-sized and will be less than 8 inches in length. The shape and texture of a realistic dildo is meant to replicate an actual penis. These toys even have bulging veins to make them seem more like a real penis. These toys are made with silicone, this does mean that they’re going to be fairly expensive. So, be ready to go hungry for a couple of weeks, since these toys will be expensive.
Strap on or Harness Dildos
Ever wanted to have some dildo fun with a partner? Then, harness dildos are your thing. It’s made for lesbian couples but, straight ones are also fully allowed to use them, we don’t judge! The dildos come equipped with a harness, hence the name, which can suspend the dildo below the waist. Check out my strap on dildo guide.
Vibrating Dildos
Regular old dildos can be considered boring by some. You just push a slab in and out of your vagina. Vibrating dildos are the perfect products for women that are willing to push things beyond the limits and really put themselves to the test. Vibrating dildos are absolute maniacs, that when used at the highest settings, will make your orgasms so much more fun as compared to a regular guy.
Glass
Don’t panic, they’re made to not be broken and can even be used with temperature play.
Check out these funky examples:


Novelty/Funky
Dildo’s can come in many shapes and sizes and looks.

Here are my favorite dildo’s
nJoy Pure Wand

The nJoy Pure Wand is a dildo, that doesn’t look anything like a dildo. It’s more of a pleasure toy that does the job of dildos so much better than dildos. The toy comes in one of the hottest boxes every. Layered with satin, the packaging shows that what you paid for is absolute gold. The box contains rethe toy itself and a small pack of lube.
It’s perfectly curved to fit a female’s body and hit just the right spots. The material used in making this toy is medical grade stainless steel. The toy is fully body and skin-safe and has absolutely no risks involved. It has an insertable length of 8 inches, so be prepared, this bad boy will give you more than you can handle.
Pros
- Double ended balls for extra sensations
- Absolutely amazing packaging
- 8 inches of pleasure
- Non-porous stainless steel
- Curved to hit the G-spot
Cons
- Lacks realism, but this isn’t a toy meant for realism.
LoveHoney Basics 7 Inch Realistic Dildo

This dildo from Love Honey is the ultimate product for folks that don’t want to spend more than a week’s pay on their sexual activities. The first thing you’re going to notice, or more likely be intimidated by, is the girth of this dildo. Things not fitting might not always be true for most women out there, however, with the LoveHoney Basics Dildo, there’s a huge probability that this toy might not even fit inside you. The toy looks enormous in pictures, but trust us on this one, it’s even bigger in person.
The next thing worth mentioning is the PVC material. Yes, some of you are going to feel skeptical about LoveHoney’s product just because it’s made out of something that might not be entirely body-safe. However, the PVC is premium-grade and totally non-porous. PVC material is not always body-safe, however, the material that Love Honey uses won’t impose any health issues at all.
This is an incredible toy and it deserves to be on any list titled ‘best dildos’. However, this is not for total newbies. If you’re on this list to buy your very first dildo, find some other product. But, if you’ve been wanking with dildos for a couple of months and want a new challenge, then the Love Honey Basic 7 Inch dildo is the perfect toy for you.
Pros
- Extremely Girthy
- Affordable for everyone
- High-Quality PVC Material
- Decent Size
- Looks pretty real
Cons
- Not one for the faint of heart
Doc Johnson John Holmes Realistic Dildo

The John Holmes is a pretty simple toy and there’s not much sophisticated going on inside this thing. However, the major reason why it’s such a success is because it’s molded from the junk of the legend himself, John Holmes. Doc Johnson decided that men can get a piece of famous pornstars through Fleshlight Girls, it’s only fair enough that girls can also share the shame experience.
Holmes himself claims that his penis was 16 inches, which might be a slight exaggeration since no one actually held a measuring tape to his wiener. But, according to the folks in Doc Johnson, Holmes was actually 12 inches and they incorporated that entire 12 inch penis into their amazing toy.
The John Holmes is one of the most realistic dildos you’re ever going to find. Sure, the tone is slightly lighter than you’d expect of an actual penis, but the material, the feel of the surface, the veins; everything just pairs up wonderfully and creates a monster you can’t resist.
While we’re on the topic of material, it’s obvious that Doc Johnson didn’t save any expenses. The material used is ULTRA SKYN (yes, in full caps and with a Y). The ULTRA SKYN is a high quality silicone that is specifically designed for sex toys to make them feel more lifelike. It takes to temperature really well and feels just like a real penis.
Pros
- Absolutely AMAZING size and girth
- Molded from the penis of the legend John Holmes himself
- ULTRA SKYN material for added realism
- Impeccable combination of long and realistic dildos
Cons
- The ULTRASKYN material is extremely, extremely sensitive to heat.
- The toy does give off a bit of odor.
The next two options are for those who want internal stimulation and I’ve provided them as examples of something a bit different to your average dildo.
Lush by Lovense

The Lovense Lush is an absolute marvel of a sex toy. It’s one of the best-selling toys and for good reason. This isn’t a full-fledge dildo, it’s a vibrator like the Touch, but the sensations from this thing will make a real penis boring for you. The design of this thing is somewhat uncanny. It’s oval-shaped with an extended heading outwards.
That arm does look a bit weird. You’d think it was meant for clitoral sensation; which it can do pretty well. However, it’s meant to improve connectivity. A lot of internal vibrators have this issue. They can connect pretty well normally, but they lose their touch once they go inside to do the dirty work. In order to counter this notorious issue, Lush sticks an antenna out of your vagina to ensure that your device doesn’t lose connection during play.
Pros
- Brands a powerful motor
- Antenna to ensure impeccable connection
- Curved to hit the G-Spot
- Several modes and intensities including the option for custom vibrations
- Compatible with Lovense’s mobile app
- Amazing silicone material
Cons
- The motor hitting the tip of the tail could really kick things up a notch. But, this isn’t a con, just a minor improvement we’d like to see.
LELO Ina Wave

LELO is a massive name in sex toys. They are one of the most reputable sex toy companies going around. The Ina Wave lives up to those expectations. It comes in an absolute beauty of a box which is something frequent customers tend to expect from LELO. They also give you everything you could ask for, including lube and a storage pouch.
The LELO Ina Wave could be compared to a mini rabbit vibrator. The smaller part of the toy is designed to stimulate your clitoris. The bigger part is meant to be used internally. Each shaft owns a completely separate motor with each of them having ten different vibration patterns along with twelve speeds. So, that means you could customize the Ina Wave with 44 different settings. Yeah, pretty amazing we know, you can pick up your jaw from the floor later. You can also check out the Lelo Mona Wave as an alternative.
Pros
- Great packaging
- Decent Size
- Powerful motor
- Several different modes
- Smooth silicone material
- Perfect ratio of flexible and rigid
Cons
- A little loud than most people would like
- Not entirely waterproof
Other dildo’s I’ve tested:
Icicles No. 18 Textured Glass double dildo
Icicles No 24 Rose Tentacle Glass Dildo